Celebrity Crushes- Sorry Anna

My recent engagement has inspired me to make a list of celebrity crushes . With all due respect to my lovely fiance Anna, knowing I will be with only one woman for the rest of my life has sparked the imagination. Part of me says - what could have been. When celebrity crushes are mentioned there are of corse the obvious choices. Names like Nicole Kidman, CatWoman, Mary Don Boyle, Julia Roberts, Mrs. Tindle from the 2nd grade, and clearly Lois Griffin are the first off the tongue. On a more realistic , "attainable" note, three special names come to mind. 

Suzy Kolber

Joe Namath had it right . His desire to kiss Suzy Kolber on Monday Night Football a few years back was evident, and it wasn't just the booze talking. Suzy Kolber is the main reason I watch football on Monday nights. Professionalism and confidence ooze onto her microphone, melting hearts and raising shorts across the country. The short hair and manly voice surprisingly do something for me in a sick sort of way. In addition to the looks , she clearly has football insight and knowledge. I can just picture us on the beach at sunset, holding each other closely, and her spitting out sports knowledge. Unlike her coworker Rachel Nichols (woof woof) , Suzy is the perfect mix of looks and sports knowledge. She is the first combination of the two since the infamous Linda Cohn. If there were no Anna, I would love Suzy Kolber to commentate. . . on the field. . . of my heart. 

Kelly Kapowski

Zach Morris is easily the luckiest man to ever walk the earth. The best hair in the business-check. Cool cell phone - check. Killer band - check. Those things, among others, are just the tip of the iceberg. Zach's lifelong love and wife, Kelly Kapowski was the first crush of my life. Few women on earth are worth waking up for at 7 in the morning, but Kelly is one of them. With girl next door looks, work habits of an illegal immigrant, and the heart of your sweet grandmother, Kelly is the mold of which my dream-woman was made after. Throw in all state volleyball skills, and you have solid gold. My desire to marry Kelly started when I was just a young boy watching the show with my sister. Unfortunately for us all, Kelly is off the market. The idea of an affair has crossed my mind, but no one messes with Zach Morris. Just ask Slater. 

Katie Couric

Katie Couric is my all time biggest crush. It was love at first sight. Katie could report the world is ending in a fiery demise, and her words would melt my heart. She is a sorority girl from Virginia. Her smile is to me what Kryptonite was to Superman. There is no list of things I would not do to get close to her . Nothing. Though my fan mail goes unanswered, my love remains. It's hard for me to talk about Katie, because of the jitters I get. Her smile makes me studder, go weak in the knees, and gives me instant diarriah. The good news is Katie is single ( through a disaster). It's only a matter of time until Katie comes to the coast to live with me , but until then, we will always have our letters. By that I mean the letters I have written, and the voice in my head that sounds similar to hers. . . Katie Johnson has such a ring to it . . . .