I Hate You Nails

This morning I awoke to see my new puppy, Darla, taking a huge dump on my mothers new carpet at my home in Sumter. Last night, Nails thought it would be a good idea to feed Darla chili. While she may have enjoyed it , the second time around was not as good. The two large piles of poop (see above) were easily the worst smell . . .ever. It smelled exactly like my farts do after I have chili. To make matters worse, after cleaning up the massive doo doo ( it is 6 am ), I needed something to drink. I reached for the bottle of diet coke by my couch, and took a big gulp. It did not take long for me to realize it was actually tobacco spit. I threw up, and then threw up some more. Just then I got a whif of the chili poop, and I threw up again. Thank you, Nails, for allowing me to have a great morning,